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The Freshwater Prince of Bel-Atlantis
The Freshwater Prince of Bel-Atlantis is the nineteenth episode of the second season of Crash Bandicoot: N-Ventures!, though it was the eighteenth episode produced. A loose attempt at a Prohibition-era episode, it centres on Pinstripe getting fired, and making a new life for himself by smuggling freshwater into salty salty Atlantis. During production, it was very briefly known as Lightly Salted Pin-Nuts. Plot Summary One fine day, Pinstripe Potoroo is awoken by a knock at his office door. He gets up to open it. It's his best friend in the whole wide world, Dr. Neo Cortex! Pinstripe tries to engage in inane small talk about the weather, but Cortex just gets right down to business: the Potoroo's fired. Pinstripe can't believe it. Fired, after thirty-five years of dedicated service! Later that day, he pays a visit to Cortex Island's unemployment office, where he begs Between Jobs Bill and Virtually Unemployable Larry to give him unemployment benefits. After bickering between themselves for a bit, Bill and Larry decide to grant this request; however, due to Cortex Island's strict welfare laws, his unemployment benefits amount to three peppermint breathmints. Disgruntled, Pinstripe decides to find a chronological time era where he WILL be wanted! Late at night, he sneaks into Tropy's Time-Twisting Machine. He can't see, so he just punches a bunch of random buttons, and the machine whisks him back in time. He awakes the next morning under the sea, in Atlantis, circa the 1930s, alongside Crash, Coco, Pura, and Aku Aku, who was apparently near the Time-Twisting Machine with him. Pura threatens to maul him, but Pinstripe explains to her that he no longer works for Cortex, so they are no longer mortal enemies. Crash hears this, and asks if Pinstripe would like to come over to his hotel room later and watch the popular undersea programme The Orpah Win-Freeze-Dried-Halibut-Filets Show on Wumpavision. Pinstripe respectfully declines. Crashie and company head off to find somewhere to stay during their unintentional deep-sea vacation, while Pinstripe heads off to have a word with the mighty queen of the deep, Empress Ethel Mermaid (Special Guest Star Rue McClanahan). Pinstripe enters her chambers, and desperately asks her for a job. But first, she wants to know his name. He tells her, but she expresses umbrage at the fact that it is not fish-themed, as the laws of Atlantis dictate. Pinstripe phones Bill and Larry on his yellowular bananaphone and asks them to come up with a fish-themed persona. They think of something immediately, and he proudly tells Empress Ethel that he is now known as Finstripe Potoroe! As such, she agrees to give him a job, as the shopkeeper at the local knick-knack shop. Meanwhile, Team Bandicoot is relaxing in their room at the local Best Wet-stern. As per the laws of Atlantis, they have renamed themselves as Catfish Barnaclecoot, Codcod Barnaclecoot, Perchra, and Akoral Akoral. Catfish flips on the deep-sea 1930s Wumpavision, which is airing a Special Wumport: apparently Empress Ethel Mermaid has banned the sale and consumption of freshwater. We see her giving a press conchference, wherein she proudly declares that, from this day forth, Atlantis will be a salty-only city! Catfishie finds this boring and, against Codcod's wishes, flips the Wumpavision to the latest episode of The Orpah Win-Freeze-Dried-Halibut-Filets Show. She's talking with her audience about how horrible those plastic rings they use for six-packs of land pop are. Meanwhile, Finstripe's first day of knick-knack peddling is boring. His customers are boring, and the knick-knacks are boring. Oh, how he longs for the thrilling criminality that can only come with being the CEO of a nuclear power plant! His next customer is the extremely weak and pathetic Sammy the Salmon (Tim Curry). Initially, the Potoroe finds Sammy's pathetic weakness immensely hilarious. But when Sammy defends himself by saying he's only weak because he's a freshwater fish in an all-salty world, a lightbulb goes off in Finstripe's head. The lightbulb (Kevin Michael Richardson) tells Finstripe he's finally found his calling in life! Later that night, after the store has closed, Finstripe wracks his brain. Who does he know that's good in the water? He finally remembers that Dingodile is one-quarter crocodile, on his mother's side. Finstripe phones Dingodile on his yellowular bananaphone. Ripper Roo picks up, for some reason. Potoroe asks for Dingodile, but Ripper Roo just wants to talk about the awesome new binomial theorem he came up with. Finally, Finstripe threatens Ripper Roo with a cannon. This finally convinces him to set down the phone and go get Dingodile. While he's away, Rilla Roo comes along, and starts sucking on the phone, as if it were a pacifier. This sound annoys Finstripe greatly. Finally, Dingodile comes running in to get the phone. Finstripe asks if he's up for some deep-sea criminal mischief. Dingodile says he is. Finstripe tells him to come up with a fish-themed persona, so Dingodile hastily dubs himself Dingoldfish. They promise to meet up in Atlantis the next day. Meanwhile, Catfish Barnacle-coot is still watching The Orpah Win-Freeze-Dried-Halibut-Filets Show. Today, Orpah Win-Freeze-Dried-Halibut-Filets (Tara Charendoff) is interviewing Empress Ethel Mermaid. Orpah asks about the new freshwater law, to which Ethel replies that freshwater is evil. She reiterates that anyone found swimming in freshwater in Atlantis will be punished with a terrible life sentence of tickling. Catfishie is disgusted by the awkward news-like turn Win-Freeze-Dried-Halibut-Filets's show has taken, so he flips off the Wumpavision and asks Codcod and Perchra if they'd like to go out and get dinner instead. They agree, though Codcod says she'd like to dress up for the occasion, and her only dress is wrinkly. Catfish suggests ironing it. The hotel room has an iron in it, but no ironing board. Thinking quickly, Codcod realises that Akoral Akoral would make a terrific makeshift ironing board. She does so. Akoral Akoral very obviously does not enjoy being ironed on, to Catfishie's amusement. The next evening, Dingoldfish arrives in Finstripe Potoroe's store. At this point, we begin a montage set to the tune of this week's original song, "Criminals, with a Capital Sea!", a duet between Finny and Dingoldy. First, Finstripe uses a ceramic kitty figurines to act out the caper for Dingoldfish. Then, once he understands, Dingoldfish departs, swimming up, across the ocean, to the banks of the Three Islands' famous Crystal Mountain Springs Island, where he sneaks into the famous Crystal Mountain Springs Island Purified Crystal Mountain Spring Water brand bottled water bottling plant, utilises his ninja-like reflexes to sneak past the scores of workers without arousing suspicion, and finally grabs their famous Wetty Power Crystal, which apparently is used to purify the spring water or something. Dingoldfish then returns to Finstripe. They work through the night, using the Wetty Power Crystal to purify a bunch of salty Atlantis water into forbidden freshwater, and the next day, Finstripe makes a killing by illegally selling it to the customers of the knick-knack shop. Finally, as the song finally ends, Finstripe sweeps all the money he made into a big pile, and rolls around in it, like some kind of shallow cartoony cartoon character. Meanwhile, Perchra and the Barnaclecoots return from dinner. Akoral Akoral stayed behind in the hotel room, comically buried under a huge pile of icepacks, begging and pleading the Ancients to relieve the pain from his ironing fiasco. Catfish sits down and flips on Wumpavision. It's still airing The Orpah Win-Freeze-Dried-Halibut-Filets Show, for some reason. However, now Orpah is interviewing famous Hollywood actor Melbrook Gabbons (Tom Kenny) about his upcoming blockbuster, Lethal Wumpon 4. This isn't news-like, so Catfishie likes it again. Melbrook offers to take some audience questions. Tiny is in the audience, for some reason, and asks if he remembers Tiny from the last time they met. Melbrook says he doesn't. Tiny keeps insisting that they did meet, however. Finally, Gabbons shouts that he's had enough, so Orpah uses her bubble vision to trap Tiny in a soundproof bubble. She then tells her viewers to stick around, because after the break, she's interviewing another famous Hollywood actor, Frenchiewaiter Stewart! However, Codcod turns off the Wumpavision. She's seen Finstripe through the H2window, and he's up to no good! Catfish knows what he has to do: he dial's Cortex's 1-555-MINION tip line and files a complaint. "Cortex will take care of it," he declares! Catfishie then turns the Wumpavision back on. That Frenchiewaiter Stewart sure is foreign and kooky, by golly! Meanwhile, Finstripe is still rolling in his big pile of money, while Dingoldfish does the work. Suddenly, Cortex bursts in! Except, by Atlantesian law, he has renamed himself Dr. Seao Cor2O! And he's brought Empress Ethel Mermaid with him! Finstripe panics, and angrily accuses Tommy of snitching. Ethel protests that Tommy's name isn't sea-themed, so she has her royal guards place it under arrest. "You're next," she tells Finstripe. The Potoroe orders Dingoldfish to fight them off, so he fires off his flame breath at Ethel. However, Ethel swims out of its way, and counters with even more powerful flame breath, defeating Dingoldfish immediately! Finstripe attempts to bolt, but this is quickly hampered by the fact that Seao and Ethel are still blocking the doorway. Finally, Finstripe admits that he's trapped. He apologises to Ethel, who says she was only making laws for the good of the seatizens of Atlantis. Seao tells Finstripe that he went over the line: while Dr. Cor2O is an evil villain, he still knows not to challenge the authority figures that really matter. Finstripe apologises to Cor2O, too, and the two tearfully embrace. Cor2O rehires Finstripe on the spot, for some reason. All his happy again! Until Uka Uka warps in, and starts berating Cor2O for failing at his brilliant scheme to fire Pinstripe! Er, Finstripe! Ethel interrupts him to force him to come up with a fish-based name, as per Atlantesian law. Instead, Uka fires a beam, and creates a brand new species of fish called the Ukafish. He says his name is a reference to this well-known species of fish. Ethel begrudgingly decides that this counts. With that matter settled, Uka resumes yelling at Cor2O. For some reason, Perchra enters and says she's learned a lesson from all of this, too. Perchra tells the viewers at home that having a pet goldfish is a big responsibility - make sure to feed and clean its fishbowl daily!